The special day is here and I'm already on my way to make myself feel special :D
Going by last year's experience, there will be many people who will make me feel really really special in the next 22 hours, but me being me, I hate depending on others for my happiness.
This day is going to be all mine, entirely mine in every possible form. The beginning has been in typical 'me' style- as I write this, I have switched off my phone and there's not a single soul impinging on my dear privacy- only God watching over me, perhaps amused. I had already told my friends in the pg to not wish me at 12 as I would be busy (somebody special? They asked, with smug smiles and raised eyebrows) so this much-wished-for solitude is not going to be gate-crashed.
I took a moment to be clear on what my idea of celebration is. No cutting cakes. Neither blowing out candles nor passing around drinks and gifts. Dancing like mad with friends, getting 'high'- no, not that either.
Dwelling on the genius of God, thanking him for the bounty that surrounds me, reading thought-provoking spiritual stuff, getting drunk on poetry and finally pouring out my thoughts on to a page in Microsoft One Note- what bliss!
Turning 20 feels nice. I have always thought myself to be a grown up person and finally stepping into the grown-up club is cool. 19 isn't exactly teenage, but it still is not 20. 20 is different.
Nothing, of course, is going to change in a day as part of stepping out of the officially-allowed-to-be-mad age bracket. Much will remain the same, except those that I'll try to change on a conscious level. Like?
See the change in me yourself. We don't want to kill the mystery, do we?
The bed beckons me. There's so much to say but it's high time I slept. Only if there was enough time for us to read all the books we wanted to read and say all the things we wanted to say!
Anyways. Happy birthday to me :)